End of Life

Watching Mum die from a terminal illness was the most emotionally stressful situation I’ve ever been through. Everything that happened from 5th November 2017 (the day it had been discovered that Mum’s cancer had spread and was incurable), was so difficult that it is beyond comprehension. Mum was in a hospice for a few weeks duringContinue reading “End of Life”

What have you learnt from the loss of a loved one?

Number 2 – Realisations in grief The second thing I’ve learnt since losing my loved ones is the realisation that not everything about them was good. People are people, they have good traits and bad traits, and dead people aren’t an exception to that rule. The things I would sacrifice to experience one more hugContinue reading “What have you learnt from the loss of a loved one?”

Losing my Grandpa

Deda was Nan’s husband. He wasn’t related to us by blood. My maternal grandfather passed away in 1966. Nan met Deda in the late 70s and they soon married. He was in my Mum and Uncle’s life from their teenage years up until his death, and treated them as though they were his own children.Continue reading “Losing my Grandpa”

Grief and Fear

Lidia from The Grief Girl talks about the fear that can creep in with grief. “No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.” I remember seeing this quote online after countless hours of scrolling through my phone- trying to find grief support the day after my dad died. I must admit: atContinue reading “Grief and Fear”

Missed Opportunities

Lockdown restrictions for Covid-19 have cancelled all public events and holiday travel. I have found it difficult to be positive about the changes in our trajectory. Let’s start at the beginning; I’m a bridesmaid for my friend who was due to be getting married earlier this year. Firstly, her hen do was cancelled. We wereContinue reading “Missed Opportunities”

Arranging Mum’s Funeral

Maybe about a week before Mum died, I messaged my friend Sophie whose Mum works as a funeral director. I asked Sophie if I could come round hers at some point and chat to her Mum about what to expect when planning a funeral, the “plans”, the average costs etc. At this point, Sophie andContinue reading “Arranging Mum’s Funeral”

The Aftermath of Mum’s Death

Mum passed away at 3pm, on the morning of her death, we had been contacting close family and friends to alert them of the situation. Mum’s brother and my two cousins were hard to get hold of that day – but we eventually did get hold of them and they arrived to us around 4pm.Continue reading “The Aftermath of Mum’s Death”

She’s Dying (Part 2)

The thing that people don’t tell you (well didn’t tell me) about a terminal illness is how relentlessly invasive it is. That sentence sounds naïve. I don’t mean about how invasive it is to the person suffering it, that’s pretty obvious… it’s invasive for the people around them, for the home environment, for the finances,Continue reading “She’s Dying (Part 2)”

She’s Dying

Mum came home from the palliative care unit in late November. She was “herself” for a little while because she was secure and comfortable at home, but the non-healthcare environment of home and having non-healthcare professionals (my Mum’s partner and I) at home meant she soon started to deteriorate. It was difficult. My Mum wasContinue reading “She’s Dying”

Summer 2017

After Mum had had her surgery and had carried her gross bodily fluid bad around with her, she started radiotherapy. She’d gotten so strong that she was driving herself to radiotherapy sessions, because she’d always been so independent before cancer, this was a huge deal for her. Mum had come back home, could get herselfContinue reading “Summer 2017”